My last post for this blog was back in August.... it was when I had accepted a job in Stockton over the phone. I had set up a Full Day Kindergarten classroom. I spent 3 days sitting in Stockton, waiting for them to give me the okay to come in and sign my contract. No call. No Contract.
Feeling defeated, I then made my way back to Sacramento to pick up my son from daycare, when I got a call from a principal here in Sacramento. I had interviewed for openings in 5th, 6th, and 7/8 core classes over the summer after being recommended from my Student Teaching placement. Two girls in my teaching cohort were hired for the 6th grade jobs, and I.... well, I wasn't. I wasn't bitter. Just sad and defeated as I was in limbo. Anyway, the principal called to offer me a half day kindergarten position. After some soul searching on the phone with another cohort friend, I called back and said yes. This was August 13th 5:45pm. August 14th - keys 8:00am, staff meeting 9am, drove down to stockton and set up classroom until 11:30pm. August 15th -first day of school.
Fast forward to today. I am sitting at home on a Tuesday. It's President's week (no school for our district). I am alive. No, seriously. That's what I have to tell my family and friends: "Sorry I have been MIA. I've been... (sick, busy, crying, planning, cleaning, sick again, at a meeting, reading this teacher help book, crying, sick again etc)."
This has been the hardest 6 months of my life! I have a TOUGH class. No I'm not suggesting that any first year teacher's class isn't a tough class. I really do have a tough class. I go through my day putting out fires all day. I am hoping that now that one of my kinder littles has been moved to a proper classroom, that I will be able to reteach behaviors (for the 100th time) and teach more content.
So much pressure to get results and increase the rigor of the classroom. As a teacher, it's hard to find the balance that Kindergarteners need with the huge expectations and the gaps they come to school with.
I have watched many friends leave the profession. Run and hide. Give up. I won't give up. I won't back down. I was meant to teach, and somehow I'll make that happen.
To my friends and family - I promise I haven't forgotten about you. Even if I have to start setting reminders on my phone to check in with you all - I'll make it happen. I got the "Touch"
